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Hey Reader,

I love train journeys but I swear to the little baby frogspawn that some people need yeeting out of the train window.

Like the woman I sat across from on the way to Newcastle on Monday morning.

Who was clipping her nails.

On the train.

AND THE NAIL CLIPPINGS WERE PINGING ACROSS THE TABLE.

What in the world of dragged-up-by-trash-pandas was happening here?

My coffee tasted just fine without the piquant coffee art of nasty ol’ lady nails, thanks very much.

The guy across the aisle did not need any bacterial body part seasoning for his chicken salad sandwich.

And the entire carriage did not need The Audacity of People on Trains Who Think Everywhere Is Their Living Room.

Let me also present:

• Man having conversation on speaker phone at top volume discussing where to go out for drinks later (may I suggest Hooters as you seem like that type)
• Woman plucking eyebrows while leaning towards window over stranger who looks ready to throat-punch her
• Man eating the stinkiest egg sandwich you’ve ever encountered on any train journey ever and who I can only assume is eating gone-off eggs and will suffer for his choices later
• Teenage boy taking up not two, not three, but FOUR seats with his stretched out legs, stinky feet on the seats, and his bag on the row behind, who WILL get a smashed ankle if I have to push past him
• Drunken group shrieking at top volume about their latest unprotected sexcapades in the quiet coach thus warning everyone to not touch them lest they catch the pox

And then there’s you, who feels like maybe you’re “too much” and “nobody wants to hear your story” and “ooh I’m not sure about putting myself out there”.

LET ME ASK YOU, FRIEND.

When there are people out there treating the entire world like their living room, why are you so reluctant to step up, take up space, and tell your story?

I want different points of view. The voices who are quieter, more thoughtful. The ones who’ve been told to sit down and shut up for too long.

Claim some of that audacity for yourself.

Write that book.

Post that LinkedIn update.

Make that sassy YouTube video.

And if you’re wondering where to do all of those things?

May I introduce the Creative Playground — a small (and it’ll remain small, under 50 members) group of people who get together several times a week to rant about people on trains, get excited about their vegetable gardens, and — most important — work on that thing that’s important to them right now.

You can find out all the details and join us here but just real quick, here’s what it is:

• Weekday Power Hour co-writing sessions at 7am and 12noon on Zoom
• Time and space to set intentions, ask questions, and get support on challenges
• Monthly mini-workshops on a range of creative topics
• Monthly hotseat-style Q&A sessions to solve our problems
• People you’ll want to be besties with in real life

You can show up with bedhead, camera off or on, with whatever vibes you have that day (I promise if you’re feeling sad you’ll leave feeling better and if you’re already feeling happy you’ll have the BESTEST laugh at some point).

It’s £50 + VAT per month but you can try us out for just £1 for the first week. No risk. No contract.

Check it out here:

And now for the Friday Goodie Bag! Here’s what I’ve foraged for you:

This actually magic Senegalese artist Boubou Niang

I saw Boubou Niang on Instagram the other day and his artistry absolutely blew my mind. It’s perspective shifting, surprising, STUNNING and you must go and follow him immediatement. Then think about how you can use your art/voice/personality to shift perspectives and create something surprising.

The last days of Gaza by Chris Hedges

I don’t write much about Gaza because honestly I don’t know what to say most of the time. It’s horrific. And so, like many, I turn away (but that doesn’t mean I’m not doing anything — I’m writing to my MP often, donating, having conversations). Other people, however, are writing about it — and this piece I thought was worth sharing because it looks at the genocide, and Western complicity, in the context of history and in the context of future historians.

​This episode of This American Life talking to doctors returning from Gaza is worth a listen, too.

Good Will Hunting and the AI revolution

Eddie Shleyner, one of my favourite writer voices on LinkedIn, wrote a really cool piece about AI and art and what’s really important, using the lesson from the movie Good Will Hunting and if you’re worried about the impact of AI on art, and your voice, and the world, you should read this.

The best gorilla joke of 1897

Gorilla: Did you hear abou the gorilla who escaped from the zoo?
Zookeeper: No, I did not.
Gorilla: That is because I am a quiet gorilla.
[Muffled sounds of gorilla violence]

For more silly and unusual historical links, check out this Instagram thread.

A little masterclass in telling a funny story

I don’t know if you know Tig Notaro, the comedian? She was also on Star Trek: Enterprise which is cool. Anyway, there’s a real short podcast episode (16 mins) here in which she tells a story about running into 80s pop star Taylor Dayne an unfeasible number of times, and it’s funny, and it’s a little lesson in how to tell a funny story. You don’t need a big dramatic event to be funny. The smallest things can do it.

What I’m reading

I am neck-deep in Leviathan Wakes by James S A Corey, which is book 1 of The Expanse. It’s absolutely cracking space opera and I’m gonna bulldoze through the entire 10 books as fast as possible. YEE HAW.

Also still reading Louis Grenier’s Stand the F*ck Out because I read nonfiction slowly. It is GREAT.

What I’m writing

New jokes for my next stand-up comedy gig in August. Some thoughts to go in my upcoming memoir. Some snippets of thoughts about approaching an agent and/or publisher for it.

Word of the day

Komorebi 木漏れ日

This beautiful Japanese word is formed from the Japanese words for “tree”, “to leak”, and “sun” and loosely translates to “sun shining through the trees” and it’s perfect.

Because that green-gold flickering light you get when you’re in a sunny tree tunnel needs a word of its own.

Komorebi is popular in haiku, other poetry, and song, and rightly so.

Quote of the day

This is true, for me at least. I’ve never done anything good until after I’ve had absolutely enough of my own nonsense.

Now, with other people putting their nonsense out in public alllll the damn time, how about you create something wonderful? Shed your nonsense in a safe, quiet place (cough cough the Creative Playground) and then use it to make something magnificent.

Happy weekend!

TTFN,

Vicky